Friday, February 29, 2008

#3 Cognac

This is somewhat well known, but if you ask the number one hard alcohol that Asians prefer, it is Cognac. From the ghetto fabulous Asians, to your sophisticated Asian, if you want to party down, be sure to have your Cognac. Which brands of cognac you ask? Popular Asian preferences include Courvosier, Remy Martin, or a personal favorite of many (if not all) Asians from northern california, Hennessy.

Almost in every party, or club consisting of Asians- you will see constant series of downing group shots, but of course before each shot everyone needs to pose for someone's digital camera so they can post it on their blog or myspace (another future post). If you as a non-Asian would like to feel accepted in these social gatherings, just bring a bottle of any of the above cognacs, men will praise you, women may possibly fondle you a bit depending on how much they have drank, or plan to drink. I'm not saying take advantage of these women, no, Asian women can actually handle their cognac quite well.

And remember, do not call Hennessy, "Hennessy," any Asian knows you've got to call it "the Hen," or "da Hen." And occassionally for Remy Martin, just call it "Remy." By saying these cognacs in their full names disrespects how cool these cognacs actually are. (don't worry about courvosier, it sounds cool anyway).

For example, you'd wanna say, " anyone wanna take a shot of the Hen?" More than likely you will get a pack of at least 5 Asians running towards you with their hands in the air, over excited, and ready to party, as if you just called their winning lottery ticket number. Asians can go through a big bottle of "Hen" pretty fast, so expect it to last nothing but an hour at a party of about 15-30 guests. Sometimes at a party of more than this amount of guests, Asians are notorious for hiding their bottles of Hen or Courvosier in a paper bag wrapped in another plastic bag as to only share it with their closer friends. They too know the consequences if the word of a bottle of cognac were to get out...mobs would start, and in just one round of shots the bottle is gone.

Do not think twice about bringing Vodka, tequila, or rum, unless they're the high class brands such as Patron, Belvedere, or Grey Goose. Asians are quite picky with their alchohol when it is not cognac.

It is also very common for Asians to keep the bottles in a collection in their kitchens or bedrooms of all their Cognac. Asians take as much as pride in their congac drinking, almost as much as Asians an Kareoke. (refer to #2). And behind each bottle most likely is a story of such drunken antics but nothing too crazy... Asians aren't really known for doing things too insane like otherNon-Asians.

And Asians will drink Cognac in no other way except in the form of shots, and the occasional half shot for those who need to slow down a bit, or the Designated Driver as even an Asian DD cannot resist drinking just a little Cognac. And you may also see Asians buying a "fifth" or what I like to call, old man's small bottle, of Cognac and do innocent sipping behind the scenes.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

interesting that in NO Cal, most take it as shots, here in my bar in Texas we can get through between 30 and 40 bottles on a good night, and they all drink it with mixers like cranberry or coke over ice, which to me is just so wrong, oh and also it Must be VSOP, i have a bottle of VS that was sent by mistake sitting in the bar for six months at least.

VSOP to me should be enjoyed in a wide rim glass and at room temp, but oh well i will take a shot of it when offered lol